I imagine if you are going through a break-up, the Timehop App is not your friend. Particularly if that break-up had years of good before it, lots of memories tucked away in every social media outlet.
I felt that way today, when I did my morning phone routine. Instagram, Facebook, Weather, Missed Texts, and Timehop.
And that was about when the break up started, my novel and me. We used to spend every day together. I talked about it with friends. I was excited to wake up so I could see it again, and loved our dates at coffee shops. I started working 20 hours a week at a cafe and thought, no problem, I can still make time for my novel while I work. Lots of people do that.
But slowly over the year, I stopped making my novel a priority. I neglected it, and went off with friends to talk about it behind its back. I started working on other projects. I let work consume my free thoughts. My novel was always in the back of my head, a guilty pang. People asked, ‘how’s your novel?,’ and I would just shrug my shoulders and look off in the distance, remembering the good times.
Thankfully for me, my novel isn’t a human being. It’s okay with being pushed aside until I can come back to it. But it’s almost been a year, and much of that excitement is gone. I’m afraid if I were to attempt to reconnect, I’d need to start all over.
That means courting. Going on a few coffee dates. Getting to know it again, find out what its hopes and dreams are, how we can benefit from each other. Promising to put it on a pedestal, and not let other things get between us…
Like all good relationships, it’s tough. I try to find a balance between family, work, creative goals, social life, housework, etc. I’m ashamed at how weak I was in this particular relationship, and hope my novel will have me back. I’m ready to move forward again.