Growing up, I was never one of those students who was like, “oh man, I totally failed this test,” then got my paper back with a bright red A+ 100%!!! Those people made me mad. I always knew how I did.
I kind of feel like a high school student again, eagerly awaiting my test score, except this time around, I honestly have no idea how I did. It’s been three months since I submitted my first picture book manuscript out to my dream publisher, and still no word. The submission guidelines say it takes up to six months to hear back, and that’s only if they’re interested. So I’m halfway through that waiting game, if not longer.
The winners for the flash fiction contest I entered will also be announced soon, and while I’m not holding my breath, I’m SO CURIOUS to see who the judges picked and how it compared to what I submitted.
This is torture, not knowing. This is putting wrapped presents in front of a greedy child and saying they can’t open them until Christmas NIGHT. I just need a hint. A “you’re on the right track,” “I like this, let me talk with an editor,” or “this is rough, you have a lot of work to do before submitting something else.” After much deliberation, I finally printed off the first 3000 words of my novel and let a friend/mentor/personal Tim Gunn read what I had. It helped so much, having some constructive feedback, just like being in school again.
Through this early process of writing again, I’m finding that I need a lot of pushing and guidance, I work best with groups, and that I’m terrible at the waiting game. I feel like a student, except without teachers, assignments, a classroom, or cool backpack. I’ve decided, it’s time I join a writing group (or create one). If you read this and are interested, please let me know! In the meantime, I’m just thankful for my friends who have helped read what I have so far and offer feedback.
Maybe soon I’ll post some creative writing on the blog…woah, that’s just crazy talk. But, when in Rome, I guess. If I’m channeling my inner high schooler (or younger), I guess I need to embrace the crazy talk.